Whoops



Whoops

 

The secret to staying young is to never act your age. 

When I was a teenager and even in my early twenties, I would surround myself with younger kids. These kids were my nieces and nephews. I was known as Uncle Denny.  There is nothing like the sound of children's laughter and there is nothing like making children laugh even if it's accidentally, which is what this next story is about.

I grew up playing street hockey and I was glad to see we had some up-and-comers to introduce to the sport. It didn’t matter if I went to their house or if they came to mine hockey was going to be played. On this day my nephew is playing goal.  He might have been six or seven at the time. His brother is playing defence. His dad and I were offense. I never had a fast slapshot and that shot was not allowed. However, my wrist shot was fast enough and just as deadly. 

Ouch!!!

In a regulation hockey net, my nephew stood like a garden gnome in front of a chain-linked fence.  He tried to fill the space sporting his best goalie pose. That's when I noticed a gaping five-hole. I waited for the pass.  In case you don't know what a five-hole is, it's open space between the goalie pads. That's where the shot was supposed to go. It was a simple one-timer.  I got the pass, and I let it fly. That orange plastic ball flew alright, right into his fly. Let's just say he made the save but he was bent over in pain. Uncle Denny just wrist-shot him right in the balls. I felt so bad, but he recovered and while he recovered his dad went in goal. Well, all I can say is, bigger five-hole, bigger balls. I tagged him too. I said, “It was an accident". “Twice?” They said. I pleaded my case to deaf ears. 

 There are many games in life. One game is called payback.

We continued to play, and I promised to behave myself. I was looking for other scoring opportunities. I was trying to knock the peanut butter off the shelf (the top right corner in the net) but the shot sailed over the backyard fence.

 The payback would soon come.

The comes a time when our childlike abilities meet adulthood reality. Like leaping over a fence for instance. If there is a hole in a fence you can crawl through, crawl through. But the little boy in me said "Wait a second, I can hop this"

 Sometimes the simplest hop is hopeless.  Especially, when that hop wipes you out. 

The hockey ball was probably a stick length away. But I was Uncle Denny. I could do it. Yes, I could. I convinced myself. I could but one foot got hung up on the top of the fence and before I knew it, I spun around and kissed the ground. I landed right on my chest. I heard two sounds: the wind escaping my lungs and three kids saying, "Uncle Denny are you okay?" I breathed in picked up the ball and said "Yes" Saying yes made it okay for them to laugh their tiny little butts off. They did and they still do whenever we think back to that time. I wasn't okay. I realized something that day.  I wasn't a kid anymore. At least not physically, the jury is still out on my mentality. Just kidding.

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